You are anxious and going out on a date with a relative stranger can feel awkward.
Remember that your counterpart is likely to be as nervous as you though, even if they don’t look it!
The two pick at their dinner salads, staring down at the leafy mound before them. Finally, one of them tries to grease the wheels of conversation. Some people consider themselves skilled communicators because they can talk endlessly.
But the ability to speak is only one part of the equation—and not the most important part.
For many people, putting together a dating profile is the easy bit (although believe me, there are plenty who find this task nearly impossible).
They even think that chatting in emails or on the phone isn’t so bad either but when it comes to actually going out on a date — the very reason they were online dating in the first place — this is where they panic. They worry they’ll get found out (whatever that means) or that they’ll get tongue-tied and have nothing to say.
A man and woman face each other across a table at a downtown bistro, looking nervous and awkward. There is a stiff formality to the way they sit—no slouching. It remains to be seen if it will pick up speed, gain altitude, and soar skyward . Sometimes they lead to burning love; sometimes they go down in flames.
All the observable and obvious clues: They are nicely groomed—stylish, but not overdone. As would-be romances go, this plane is very slow to leave the gate and get onto the runway. or if it will lose engine power and sit on the tarmac indefinitely. It’s true that first dates can be one of the most nerve-wracking, anxiety-producing situations in our society. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want? The best communication occurs with an even and equal exchange between two people. Getting to know someone new is like peeling an onion one thin layer at the time. But some people, overeager to get into deep and meaningful conversation, go too far too fast. Think of conversation as a tennis match in which the players lob the ball back and forth. They ask personal or sensitive questions that put the other person on the defensive. If feeling inhibited is a problem for some people, others go to the opposite extreme: they use a date as an opportunity to purge and vent. Use this fun, lighthearted question to ask a girl to start an interesting conversation. Maybe the place she names just has special memories to her.